thoughts from the heart

so, this post today may be a little different than usual. I guess I've just had a lot of things on my mind lately, and I figured I'd write.
BYU-I has yet to contact me. A few of my friends have heard back already and I am patiently waiting.. or trying to. I'm excited and nervous for college! It's new and fun, but also kind of intimidating. I hope I do well.. And I wonder when I'll go to school! If I go sometime in January, I most likely will defer it for my mission. If I go in August, I'll go for a semester, then defer the next. I can't believe everything is so close and around the corner!
Umm I'm beginning/mid show right now. It's not terrible. I don't mind so much. I just need to continue working on keeping my mouth shut! Someone pointed out today, and it was a good reminder, she's the director. Just do as she says:) sometimes, it's just hard to remember that. I'll keep working. But it's been okay. My part is kind of funny! I like going after school too. Helps to feel like part of the cast. I do admit, it'll be nice not to have rehearsal on Saturday! I'll need the break.
My hair exploded today. I looked like Merida from Brave. But hey! She's a princess, so it works for me:)
Oh okay, so I love to photograph, but I'm not like all that fond of my photography. I feel like I have a ton to learn, and it's hard because I'm not super creative. I don't have a style yet. I love to photograph kids, and I love when people {{teen girls especially}} love their photos. I like to make people happy:) so it's nice when they feel pretty. So sorry that I haven't posted photos this week.. I just don't like them a lot.. If I do ever like any, I'll be sure to post them.
I don't have much homework tonight. Actually none at all! Just study study study!
I'm nervous for my mission.. I don't know. Just am..
Sorry, this next part will be kind of serious. It's just on my mind.
I'm not perfect. I've made a lot of mistakes in my life, things no one will ever understand. Repentance has been especially difficult at times, but I've made it through and will continue to make it through. It's still hard sometimes. But things have been especially great lately! I guess it's just taken time. Sorry that's really vague! haha I don't know how to explain it! I'm just grateful for the Lord, for my Savior, for the Atonement, and for the people God has blessed me with.
I love to serve. everyone. ABSOLUTELY EVERYONE! No matter what the circumstances. Sure I do a lot, but I wouldn't change that for the world.
I know I don't make sense. Life is crazy, I am crazy! SO CRAZY! haha but I'm still me:)

sorry it's random! I hope you are doing wonderfully:) Loves! <3